Regular readers of this column are in for a refreshing change this week. During the last few days I underwent voluntary shock treatment at one of the new twenty four hour medical centres in an effort to cure myself of my obsessive 'roadie' paranoia. I'm pleased to report that the result was an outstanding success and no longer do I feel the compulsion to attack these so-called 'soldiers of the road', these collectors of parking tickets, these junk food junkies, these speed snorting scumbags... 

And so this week I bring you an exciting new feature of Splatter Chatter, round one of the Jim Jones University "ROCK BRAIN TRANSPLANT OF THE UNIVERSE" super-quiz. The first correct entry mailed to OTS will receive a beautiful soft cover edition of Gary Herman's moving and highly sympathetic treatise of the human pitfalls of the music industry, "ROCK'N'ROLL BABYLON" 

To make things a little easier, we have devised a multiple choice quiz so all you have to do is circle the correct answer, cut out the entry from and post it to OTS. 

 

 

Who is the girl in the fishnet stockings? A Manzil barmaid? A talent scout for Virgin? An early checkout at the Chelsea? 

 

 

SECTION ONE - The History of Rock'n'Roll

1. Janis Joplin's favourite pick-me up was:
1. a- A glass of banana cocktail.
2. b- A bottle of Southern Comfort
3. c- Two bottles of Southern Comfort

1. 2. Nancy Spungen was:
   1. a- A barmaid at the Manzil Room
   2. b- A talent scout for Virgin records
   3. c- An early check-out at New York's Chelsea Hotel

1. 3. In 1958 Jerry Lee Lewis married:
   1. a- His thirteen year old second cousin
   2. b- His fourteen year old third cousin
   3. c- Nancy Spungen.

1. 4. Jimi Hendrix chucked to death on:
   1. a- A piece of Manzil Room quiche.
   2. b- His own vomit
   3. c- A pickle and peanut butter sandwich

1. 5. Richard Nixon once appointed Elvis Presley:
   1. a- Official nuclear warden for East Memphis
   2. b- An honorary narcotics officer
   3. c- Supreme commander of US forces in Vietnam

1. 6. Prior to his untimely death, Keith Moon had been to a midnight matinee of:
   1. a- Bloodsucking Freaks
   2. b- The Buddy Holly Story
   3. c- Monkey Grip

1. 1. The War & Peace was:
   1. a- A novel by Tolstoy
   2. b- A Chinese restaurant in Tempe
   3. c- A disco in the outer-west

1. 2. Nucleus booker Pat Jay once managed:
   1. a- A Laundromat at Bondi Junction
   2. a- The Stage Door Tavern
   3. c- The Yummy Yummy Food Bar

1. 3. After a gig, rock celebrities like to gather at:
   1. a- The Kings Cross Chook Bar
   2. b- Bennys
   3. c- Mr. and Mrs. Smith Motel

1. 4. The house record at the Grand Hotel was held by:
   1. a- Box of Fish
   2. b- Ted Mulry Gang
   3. c- The Slugfuckers

1. 1. When Lynyrd Skynrd's plane ran out of fuel en route to a gig in 1977, was it:
   1. a- 200 yards from an open field
   2. b- 220 yards from an open field
   3. c- 235 yards from an open field.

1. 2. When Keith Moon accidentally ran over his chauffeur, Neil Bolland and killed him, he was driving:
   1. a- A Rolls-Royce
   2. b- A mini-moke
   3. c- An advanced prototype of the bubble car

1. 3. George Michael once declined to appear on Countdown because he was suffering from:
   1. a- Bubonic plague
   2. b- A cold sore
   3. c- A severe case of gout

1. 4. After converting to the Muslim faith, Cat Stevens changed his name to:
   1. a- Yusuf Islam
   2. b- The Archbishop of Canterbury
   3. c- Salamander Jim